Fics like Writing Porn (and other ways to seduce your vampire roommates)

“There,” he says. “Taken care of. Now back to my problems—“ “NANDOR!” Guillermo is already yelling, snatching the vacuum away and pressing his face to the dusty old bag. “Can you hear me?!” He thinks he hears a defeated, squished help, and he scowls at Laszlo. “How the hell am I meant to get him out of here in one piece?!” “Not my problem,” Laszlo deadpans. “What is my problem is that I’ve run out of porn to read.” “Holy fucking—“ Guillermo is off, muttering curses as he unearths Laszlo’s laptop from under a pile of crap. “Use your computer. You know, the one you made me steal from Best Buy?! Just Google it!” “There’s porn on the internet?” “THAT IS ALL THAT IS ON THE INTERNET!”

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