Fics like I flip the television off / Turn the radio up loud

“You know,” Valentino says, eyeing Alastor with unveiled interest from the couch. Alastor feels deep nostalgia for the days when Valentino was prone to cringe away from him like a girl spotting a spider she was scared to kill. “It’s all hot-swappable.” It’s almost guaranteed that Alastor doesn’t want to know what that means. But only almost, and curiosity nags. “Pardon?” “His dick,” Valentino says casually, and through great personal restraint Alastor does not press his hands into his temples. “He’d probably be into it if you wanted to keep it in your purse.” -- (In which Alastor takes a suggestion from Valentino, to great effect. An optional, porny installment directly following the events of Here's the Reigns.)

You may also like

  1. Deal Or No Deal by BoredsoIread (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  2. T is for Trophy by X_Gon_Give_It (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  3. Barkeep, another whiskey by vcheriee (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  4. In Medias Res by Bunnygirl2101 (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  5. Damage Control by X_Gon_Give_It (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  6. If You Want It, Just Take It by art_snob (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  7. Lay You in the Ground by SapphiraLua (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  8. To Be So Claimed by frizzycrls (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  9. With Friends Like These by Rennfri (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  10. Kiss Me, Kill Me, Eyes on Me by letters_of_stars (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  11. Twin Skeletons by OverdoseDelusions (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  12. Forget And Forgive (In That Order) by Dancingdog (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon), Hellaverse | Hazbin Hotel & Helluva Boss Universe)
  13. Let’s Misbehave by Tianren (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  14. You Still Need Me by Dragonpie (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  15. Still my good boy by Jou255 (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  16. In Every Lifetime by songofhell (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  17. Sight Unseen by voxvobiscum (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  18. Escort by Phantom_of_the_Frost (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  19. Sugar & Spice by Toboe217 (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))
  20. Things We Never Did by SapphiraLua (Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon))