Fics like Tickets, Please

"So that brings us back to the question: is it ironic Heaven, or ironic Hell?" "This is definitely ironic Hell." "C'mon, you know it's not that bad. We're not being tortured. Nobody's making us do this, nothing bad's gonna happen if we don't, we just don't have anything better to do." "McVries, two futures lay before you: one where you never touch a woman again, and one where you still never touch a woman again, but the only option for handjobs is us." There is a brief moment of silence as the boys consider Stebbins' estimation, and in near-perfect unison, respond in agreement, "Ironic hell."

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