Fics like an entry of Wade W. Wilson's diary

“Seriously, I hit on Spidey and he–” “Woah, you hit on Spider-Man? And you’re still walking on the same planet?” Weasel gapes at Wade as if solely the fantasy alone is prohibited. “You and Spider-Man a thing? Did you get jumped and hit your head before coming in here? Is he, by any chance, aware of this, by the way? Or you’re spreading propaganda to support your illusion for others to believe you and then convince Spidey you’ve been dating him this whole time?” Wade scowls. “We’re dating. I can show you the million photos of him on my phone, but you’re kinda a hater here.” PERSONAL! if you’re not Wade W. Wilson or Peter B. Parker, mind your own fucking business. “That’s a bit harsh, don’t you thi–? Did you just cross out my name, Wade?”

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