Fics like when i think too much about it, i can't breathe

“I’m sorry,” John eventually manages to gasp out into Sherlock’s neck, made wet with a sticky mixture of snot and spit and tears. “I’m so sorry.” The apologies quickly become a mantra, the only words able to be forced out of a tear-thickened throat, and they’re both painfully aware that the seemingly endless tears aren’t their cause. “None of what happened is your fault,” Sherlock replies, voice gentle and firm as it drifts down from where his head rests on top of John’s. “Not one bit of it. You did everything you possibly could.” “Then why wasn’t it enough?” John asks once the tears have dried up, silent sobs still shaking his shoulders even as he finds his voice again. “Why did she still die?” John has been plagued with the same nightmare since The Andalucia.

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