Fics like Side to Side

“All I’m saying is, the guy was walking like he’d been dicked to within an inch of his life.” Clint shrugged. “And seeing as how we are all here, Bruce doesn’t do that sort of thing, the only other explanation is that our resident god of thunder gave Tony the yeehaw of his life last night.” “Two things.” Steve held up a finger. “First, don’t ever say ‘the yeehaw of his life’again. That’s a terrible sentence. Second, I know for a fact that Tony had a date with a nice girl from Colonel Rhodes’s church last night so–” Clint laughed so hard he was practically screaming, cackling peals of disbelieving laughter over shadowed by Sam guffawing over the thought of Tony dating a nice GIRL, much less a nice girl from church. “Point of order!” Natasha had to raise her voice to be heard. “Tony is practically snack sized. Anyone could get him walking with a waddle. Hell I’ve got a sparkly pink strap on that would get the job done. Let’s not assume he went ass to hammer with Thor just cos he’s walking funny.” Three sets of horrified eyes met hers and Natasha sighed. “He’s standing right behind me, isn’t he?”

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