Fics like better if we live in different worlds (keep his name carved with a heart in my underwear drawer)

"Do you want to hear about the girls I fucked tonight?" Ilya is still slurring, and Shane's wondering if he's drunk enough to throw up in his newly vacuumed car. He really hopes not. "I do not," Shane says. "I fucking love pussy," Ilya says. "They have darkrooms at that place and also private rooms so I got to have my fill of women. Are you jealous?" Shane is, like any time he heard about Ilya with a woman. Or a man. Anyone, really. But obviously, it's not the time or the place to unpack that. "No." "Needed that," Ilya continues, "after all the years of only having your boy pussy. Got soooo boring." Shane rolls his eyes. He was nearly in tears the first time he heard this, but by the millionth time it'd lost its teeth. "You've told me," Shane says. "'Variety is the spice of life.'" OR: Shane & Ilya are toxic exes who can't seem to stop meeting like this.

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