Fics like but please don't bite

“Brother, what is that?” Eduardo Camavinga halted dead in his tracks, lifting the limp shark by two manicured fingers with an expression of pure, unadulterated disgust. “You make, how many millions a year? Why do you have a dead fish from IKEA in your house?” “Put it down, Cama,” Jude said threateningly, not taking his eyes off his phone screen. “It’s a structural lumbar support device.” “It has no structure! It’s like a pancake!” or, a love story told through the eyes of a fading blue ikea shark plushie (re: jude’s lumbar support)

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