Fics like I Kissed a Frog and All I Got Was This Lousy (Hot) Boyfriend

“Sorry,” he finds himself saying, “I’m not really attracted to animals.” The frog looks put off by this. “If I had to choose a frog, it’d be you,” Hao says sympathetically. “Which I guess you must know, since I did have to choose a frog, and it’s you. Actually, uh, do you know if this counts as animal abuse? It’s just I’ve never gotten to have a pet of my own, and I was kind of hoping I’d never end up on a registry ‘cause I’d like a dog, someday.” He thinks for a moment. “…Are there registries for that kind of thing? There are, right? There should be.” Blink, blink. “Anyway, I should get this on with, right? The sooner it happens the sooner it’s over.” So, on the floor of the science building—thanks to the most incredible and cutthroat game of truth or dare Hao has ever, ever played—he purses his lips to kiss a frog. Zhang Hao's night starts with kissing a frog, and ends with a pretty boy in his bed.

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