Fics like and my heart (and my heart)

"When she breaks for air out here, she's always alone, except for the very first time. She must have fallen off of Van's shoulders, lost their game of Chicken Fight—there are hands hooking under her armpits, pulling her up, and Van's eyes are closed as she's laughing, practically shaking Shauna with the force of it, and Shauna's laughing too, because Van is so beautiful when she's happy, because everyone around her is smiling, because she's looking for Jackie and wants to tell her—Jax, I just had the weirdest fucking dream— But it smacks her across the face, a rogue wave or a plane crash, knocking her down with the weight of it, sucking the air from her lungs until she's choking or screaming or drowning, dying, finally dying—it was real. It had to be. And she's back here—here, and either here isn't real or Shauna isn't, and maybe never was, maybe none of it ever was—she's back here, and it will all happen again, again, again, unless something gives, unless something breaks. Unless Shauna breaks. Unless she lets it go." Or: Shauna kills her baby early enough to change things, this time around. Too bad she's already gone a little fucking insane anyway.

Fics like and my heart (and my heart)

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