Fics like you lose so many things you love as you grow

my dad's a drunk. i love him, really, and i know he loves me, but. he's a drunk, and a fuck-up, and he's never there, and i miss what he was when i was younger. is that so bad? to want him back? i know i shouldn't let it bother me, that he's an adult man that can make his own damn choices, but i want him back. i just want my dad back. i miss him. even when he's right next to me.

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