Fics like what's a guy gotta do to get laid around here?

“Oh nooooo,” Wolfwood drawled as the deputy moved from the wall, “don’t get the big, hulking, buff guy on me!” He dramatically leaned back in his chair, head hanging over it. “That’s exactly the 𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘦 of what a sod like me would want!” Deputy Josephson briefly halted next to Wolfwood, hands twitching for just a second. Wolfwood couldn’t help barking out a laugh at the mere sight. Too easy. “You ever handled a man of my caliber before?” Wolfwood batted his eyes. “Not to worry, I’ve had my run around the block. I’ll be gentle.” . . . Wolfwood would just like to have Vash to himself for one night. He does not get that. So he decides to make it everyone else's problem.

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