Fics like New Achievement! You’ve survived temptation!

Condition met. You’ve uttered the magic words: [R–R–REDACTED] Reward: One wish! You get one wish! No—seriously. Can you believe it? We certainly can’t. The catch is, you don’t get to choose! We’ve siphoned all of your silly little hopes and dreams—conscious and unconscious—and plucked one at random. You have the opportunity to live out one of your fantasies. Be careful, crawler. Or don’t. Daddy likes it either way. Or: Carl becomes a forester. Alone.

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