Fics like Love Bites

“Rosieeeee,” Alice sing-songs as she flings the curtains of the dressing room open, “Your favorite patron saint is back!” — “Rosalie has a regular?” The vampire in question doesn’t bother to look up. She simply rolls her eyes, raking a wide-tooth comb through her platinum blonde tresses— “Yeah,” Alice nods vigorously, “—she religiously books the third Saturday of each month because it’s the only day that Rosalie offers her V.I.P. package.” “V.I.P.?” Lauren asks with a frown, “How much is your special, Rose?” Rosalie applies more hair spray to her curls, deciding whether to entertain Alice’s shenanigans. But before she can reply— “$2,500….” Alice answers for her smugly, “—an hour.” “Jesus Christ—” Lauren curses in disbelief—brows high on her forehead, mascara pencil already forgotten, “She pays that much—and she’s never been bitten?” ”She’s never been bitten.” Their audience of vampires say in unison— Rosalie clenches her jaw until it cracks. — Or: Rosalie, Regina, and Lena drink human blood for a living. Bella, Emma, and Kara are all hot messes. Alice and Mulan both wish the birthday girl would just bite her already. Rosalie/Bella

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