Fics like 化けの花 [ghost of a flower]

Chuuya is fascinating. Not in the same way that Odasaku is. He cares so much, about everything and nothing. About his men—they’re pawns, Dazai has tried to tell him before, but it’s no use, because Chuuya still goes out and learns all of their names. Beats himself up when they die anyway. It’s heartbreaking and so, so interesting. He burns like a fire. Out of all the people in the darkness that he’s met—and that’s practically everyone—Chuuya is the most alive. He looks at him and sees his skin and the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes and the way his eyebrows furrow with irritation and sees someone so painstakingly human. Standing beside him, he feels like a ragdoll. He also feels alive. What a weird contradiction. Dazai’s plastic smile falls as he looks at Chuuya for a moment, out of the corner of his eye. He’s beautiful to him in a way that nobody else ever has been. It’s alright. Chuuya won’t miss him. -- Dazai doesn't get sick. So of course it was his rabid sheepdog would afflict him with something that made it so difficult to breathe.

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