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It is becoming troublesome that the Enterprise, despite being a computer, refuses to perform the commands Spock asks of her. He asks her for Kirk’s command history to ensure accuracy in a report. She provides a scrolling slideshow of frames, taken from a variety of recorded video communications, featuring Kirk’s… posterior. “Computer,” Spock grits out, “that is not what I asked for.” (Or: After radiation exposure, the Enterprise, newly equipped with a mind of her own, decides to bond with Kirk - and does a very poor job of it. Spock steps in to help.)

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