Fics like leave me by the spring flowers (kindness is all i can give)

He lifts Till's head off the couch, reaching out a hand to gently cup Till's cheek. The skin beneath his touch is soft and warm, and the steady pulse that thrums beneath his fingertips is soothing, despite everything. I could kiss him like this, Ivan thinks. I could kiss him, and he'd be none the wiser. It can't hurt him any more than what has already happened. He wants. He wants, wants, wants so badly, greedy monster that he is. The kind of want that makes him ache from the proof of his fallibility, a reminder of his humanity. Spring flowers, like the wreath of red he once crushed beneath his feet, like the boy he holds in his hands now. Fragile, fleeting, never once belonging to him. or: during those fleeting moments before the end, ivan thinks of a boy with stars in his eyes, the spring flowers that had bloomed so beautifully in that monochrome prison, and just what he would do to protect what will never belong to him.

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