Fics like all at once

Christmas and yearning. Sirius almost says, the marble on the tip of his tongue, about how he wants him so much it’s a permanent ache; a broken rib in his chest. How he just wants Remus there, beside him. He doesn’t understand why Remus will sit next to him on his bed, year after year, and look at him the way he does — something helpless and honest but maybe just a trick of the light — only to pull away from Sirius for weeks at a time, citing studying as an excuse and leaving Sirius helplessly alone; dog left out in the cold, waiting. He keeps waiting. He pretends he isn’t.

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