Fics like before we turn into a monster (with two heads)

“Once this case is over, I’m getting a new job. Maybe one where I just sit in my bedroom and make videos about my life. That would be nice,” Dan muses dreamily to himself—or rather, mumbles indistinctly to himself, because it’s a little hard to articulate when you’ve been shoved into the trunk of a moving car, bound, and gagged. Or, the 30K Secret Agents AU that nobody asked for, featuring an undercover mission as husbands, annoying coworkers with a betting pool (Dan is going to complain to HR about Felix), and inevitable slow-dancing to Ed Sheeran.

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