Fics like Ahoy, Pretty Buoy

‘I don’t know that man.’ Big brown eyes widened in disbelief. ‘He sure knows you,’ the doctor said tiredly. He shoved his limp hair out of his eyes. ‘No. No way. This is crazy, this is crazy! I’m not going anywhere with him until I get some proof.’ Billy smirked. ‘Come on baby, you’re starting to hurt my feelings. I have all of your ID here, our marriage certificate, what more do you want?’ ‘They could be faked, I don’t know!’ Billy's eyes lit up. 'You want more proof? You’ve got a cluster of moles on your left ass cheek that looks like a smiley face.’ Steve’s eyes widened even more before he slowly shuffled to the corner of the room, standing behind a chair and hiking his hospital gown up, twisting round to peer down at his ass. The gown dropped from his hands as he paled and looked up at Billy, his mouth hanging open in shock. Billy threw his arms out wide. ‘Come to daddy!’ Or: the Overboard AU no one asked for.

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