Fics like spider control and other forms of courtship

Geralt tries to read the man’s face before he looks around for a hidden camera. His youngest brother is supposed to be away this weekend with his boyfriend, but this entire situation reeks of Lambert’s exact sense of humor. Geralt is suddenly quite sure there’s a whipped cream pie to the face waiting at the end of wherever his neighbor is leading him with this conversation. “You can’t just hit it with a shoe?” That makes the man inhale sharply and press a hand to his chest, like a church matron clutching her pearls. “The spider is an animal, but I most certainly am not! I am not trying to banish the little beast from the mortal coil. I am simply trying to evict him from the previously-spiderless sanctuary of my home.” (Jaskier tries to recruit his neighbor Geralt to handle a spider problem) (Ciri ends up taking the lead on the assignment) (this still ends up with more Geraskier than might be expected)

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