Fics like illumination

The feeling of death creeping up behind the nerves in his spine and through the muscles in his shoulders surprises him every time it happens, regardless of how many times he’s felt it. For a man who has spent the last three years imagining the day, the moment, the scenario he’d like to die in, the feeling never fails to scare him. He’s never ready for it, it’s never the time. It never is. He’s never sure if it’s actually happening.

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