Fics like Grieving for the Living

In the grand scheme of things, not much has changed. But, Castiel thinks he’s not the same anymore. He doesn’t know if it’s for the better or the worse—sometimes it’s simply just so—and he rarely lets himself dwell on what he had to leave behind. He doesn’t know if the people he knew back then are still the same; if they even remember him, but he’s not upset over it. Castiel isn’t expecting them to wait when they hadn’t asked him to stay. It’s easier to pretend to be stupid, to pretend all the bullets, bacon and booze is filling that hole in him just as it used to. The hunts always scratch that itch a little bit, but there are days when he wants to itch and dig until he sees blood. The Cas shaped hole in him is rotting and festering, while Dean tries to convince himself that three years should be enough to get over a feeling he doesn’t even have a name for. ~ Castiel builds a life for himself as a hunter after leaving the bunker, and Dean spends the days counting up to the moment when he gets to see Cas again.

Fics like Grieving for the Living

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