Fics like Only Little Deaths

Joe had sent him a picture of negative test results and ended their conversation with an “I’m looking forward to tonight” and a promise in his voice that lit a fire in Nicky’s veins which led to one very cold shower and two existential crises. The first because he’d never been able to get further than uncoordinated and sloppy adolescent blow jobs and holding on to 40 years with such little experience made him feel like he missed his chance, and the second because what if he was so bad at sex that Joe decided this arrangement just wasn’t worth it and never spoke to him again despite the provisions that Nicky could give him.

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