Fics like My Witcher Isn’t Working, Can I Get a Refund?

Jaskier stared in horror at the man before him. No, not man, because no man would ever do something so horrifying and appalling such as this without so much as a twitch to his face, and even though Jaskier spent most of his time and effort trying to convince this self-deprecating hunk of a witcher that no, he was not a heartless monster and was in fact, still human in many aspects, Jaskier could not bring himself to do it now. Not this time. Maybe not ever. ~ You know how some game mechanics make sense in games but are absolutely ridiculous in real life? Crackfic where instead of grand adventures and heroics, Jaskier spends his travels having to deal with Geralt’s absurd behavior - from horrifying eating habits, his ridiculous collection of broken rakes, aggressive herb gathering techniques, to a frankly scary obsession with Gwent, among other things.

You may also like

  1. Don't Go Stealing My Heart by TheSilverQueen (The Witcher (TV))
  2. The Things You Overhear Hidden In A Haystack by AhoyTheShipOfDreams (The Witcher (TV))
  3. Kingdoms Come and Kingdoms Go, Rivers Run and Rivers Flow by DancingLassie (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski, more)
  4. Somebody To Love by kathkin (The Witcher (TV))
  5. He Fell into a Faerie Ring by VolWolf (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV), more)
  6. I wear your shirt like it's your arms around me by hendollana (The Witcher (TV))
  7. Honeysuckle by Amazonia_8 (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV))
  8. Wolves and Men by AvoidingAverage (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV))
  9. Paying Attention by Descarada (The Witcher (TV))
  10. all that I've been taught and every word I've got by sugarybowl (Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV))
  11. Mightier Than the Sword by ItsClydeBitches (The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types)
  12. Try, Please Try For Me by LadySesame (Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, more)
  13. boogie nights by orphan_account (The Witcher (TV))
  14. Ruin Me by Kinthinia (The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game))
  15. The Best of You and Me by giddytf2 (The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types)
  16. warm you like the sunshine by some_stars (The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types)
  17. wolves and voices by EchoBleu (The Witcher (TV))
  18. Some Bards Have All The Luck by fabrega (The Witcher (TV))
  19. Oh, Raven by athousandvictories (The Witcher (TV))
  20. your sweet whisper, your tender touch by janie_tangerine (The Witcher (TV))