Fics like chasing parties

“Is there such a thing as self-cockblocking?” he asked Bruce miserably one night. He could have been in bed with triplets tonight. Triplets. Bruce glanced dryly at him. “Sure there is, buddy,” he said. “Though most of us just call it getting rejected.” Tony flicked a spoon at his head. “Ow,” Bruce deadpanned, but there was a smile hiding in his eyes. He liked it when Tony didn’t flinch around him, didn’t treat him like he was nuclear waste that needed to be trapped in a lead box and chucked into Mount Doom. “Excuse you, I didn’t get rejected, Banner,” Tony sneered. “I’m sure you have no concept of it, but people actually want to fuck me a lot.” “Narcissist. So you voluntarily didn’t sleep with… triplets?” “Yeah.” “Jeez, pal, why.” Because Steve looked sad about it was a stupid answer, so Tony paused, thought about it, and then said, “Because Steve looked sad about it.” God in Heaven, what was wrong with his brain.

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