Fics like the identity crisis of one nicholas j. fury

“... And you should really get your cat spayed,” Earl says smugly, staring at Goose who is resting a few feet away, licking her paw. Shit. Goose eats Earl. Nick files an incident report and takes Goose to the lab to wait for her to barf up Earl because Nick is tired of replacing the accent rug in his office. Finance has gotten really stingy with the office budget lately, and Goose’s cat-flerken vomit reeks. HR assigns Goose her own incident code and installs a BEWARE OF CAT sign on Nick's office door under his nameplate. Earl stops offering unsolicited advice, and Nick buys Goose one of the new expensive horizontal scratching posts that looks like a wave. Goose looks way too pleased with herself. -- All the things Goose has eaten and the all the things people have called Nicholas J. Fury, with or without his consent.

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