Fics like No One's Here to Sleep

A version of events in which Dio has the brilliant idea that kissing Jojo would be more effective than kissing Erina, Jojo falls head-over-heels in love, William A. Zeppeli accidentally wakes up the Pillar Men half a century early, and some events come to pass that don't really summarize well. But the end result is that Dio and Jonathan end up together and very, very happy, despite (or perhaps because of) the fact that Dio never falls in love and that Jojo has to make some sacrifices. (Dio is the most beautiful and high-achieving individual Jojo's ever seen, and Dio finds that Jojo doesn't share the same disgusting weaknesses as other human beings.) There are no sleepwalkers, here.

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