Fics like Consumer Affairs

“Tom,” Sara, the Senior Marketing Associate, said levelly, “if you don’t let me promote our bedroom product line using the Winter Soldier’s tweet reviews, I will quit. I will quit today. I will leave you high and dry with a junior marketing associate and an intern, Tom. The intern just started last week. He doesn’t even know how to work the copier yet.” The VP for Public Affairs rubbed his temples. “Sara.” She slapped a piece of paper onto his desk. “I already wrote my letter of resignation. You know what it says? It says that I cannot possibly do my job if I’m deprived of the best free publicity opportunity that has ever crossed my desk, and that will ever cross it again, in the form of one James Buchanan Barnes and his Supersoldier Fuckability Index.” (Bucky reviews IKEA beds. The marketing team responds.)

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