Fics like Home Improvement Appendix: How They Met

“Speaking of American heroes—“ Phil begins. “I wasn’t,” Marcus says rudely. Phil ignores him. “It was an honor to be wing man to a real, undeniable American icon,” he says, taking shrimp from the freezer to thaw. “I have his trading card from 1952, when his image was being used by Fairchild against Joe McCarthy’s campaign. A little foxing on the edges, but otherwise in good condition. Current valuation—“ The inchoate sound of rage that Marcus makes is satisfying in the way a good bowel movement is: viciously physical, and spiritually rejuvenating.

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