Fics like rumour has it (but maybe it'd be better to just ask me)

"Tae! I think Kim Namjoon asked me out on a date?” That, makes Taehyung look away from his phone for once. “The Kim Namjoon? Sex on walking stilts, Kim Namjoon?” “No, Kim Namjoon who’s my cousin third removed. Of course, the Kim Namjoon, you walnut.” “Walnuts are actually really good for brain development.” Taehyung says distractedly before he frowns. “Wait, Kim Namjoon is your cousin?” - (Or: Namjoon and Jimin like each other, Taehyung and Hoseok are great friends, Seokjin and Jungkook aren't as great, and Yoongi is paid far too little for this. Oh, and there are rumours. Supposedly, Namjoon is a sex god. Everyone is saying it, so it must be true. Spoilers: it's not.)

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